Begin with the End

The kitchen in our cozy cottage in Utah.

Confession: I love knick-knacks; kitschy home decor items are a weakness of mine. The hard truth is as much as I love collecting fun little odds and ends to display in our home, we just won't have much space when Chuck retires, and we have to downsize.

Back in the day I collected Mary Engelbreit wall art, trinkets, and books. I had collections of snowmen and Santas. My Christmas decor filled seven large tote boxes. 

One of my favorite hobbies was scouring little shops like The Wooden Nickel and My Checkered Past for cutesy collectibles. My all-time favorite places to score darling decorations were thrift shops. Bargain prices appeal to my penny-pinching personality.

The thing is, when you have lots of kitschy shtuff, you have to have lots of shelves and tables. And when you have lots of bric a brac on lots of horizontal surfaces, dusting becomes a royal pain in the butt. Housekeeping has never been my strong suit, so my festive decor had a tendency to get a little dusty during each holiday season.

You never really realize just how much stuff you've accumulated until you have to move. Moving helps you determine just what is worth taking with you, and what really isn't worth keeping.

How many times have I had to move, and had to pare down my belongings in the last ten years? Um, that would be five times. In each of those five moves, I had to take a firm stand, and part with the possessions I'd accumulated. Yes, some of my lesser objets d'art had to go. 

My 900 square foot house in Joseph is no spacious villa, but it has been a refuge to me in the past, and will be our retirement home one day. If an item doesn’t serve a purpose, or have sentimental value, or bring me absolute joy, it doesn’t get to stay in my life because I know Chuck and I will be moving back to the cozy cottage one day. And I refuse to burden our kids with cleaning out a hoarder’s house when that time comes. 

Minimal living has so many advantages. Less possessions means less to worry about, less to maintain, less to organize, less to lose, and less to manage. Less is definitely more when it comes to stuff. 

One day, my big goal is to live a minimalist lifestyle in a tidy, little home that incorporates HYGGE, the concept that embraces coziness, comfort, and intimacy. Yes, I think it's possible to create a warm and comfy environment without being overrun by my possessions. I know I will want some of my decorations, though, because I am sentimental, and my kids and friends gave me some of those darling gifts. Sometimes it is hard to remember what my long-term goals are when I am in the thick of things, though. 

Just a couple days ago, I drove to the local thrift shop to drop off a very heavy box of knick-knacks and dishes we no longer needed. Since thrifting is one of my favorite past-times, I decided to browse the store, since I was there and all. 

My eyes went wide when I spied some darling Easter decorations. Yes, I want to live minimally, but I also want to be the grandma who decorates for every holiday, and has a house her grandchildren will love to visit. How quickly keeping the end game in mind can disappear. Only six dollars for a pair of the cutest Easter bunnies, but since I am a tightwad, I realized that was probably still a lot of money for some used decor. Then my eyes lit upon a darling little rabbit for only 50 cents. 

“Denise! Stop it. Seriously, you just dropped off a bunch of crap. Are you going to want to pack up a bunch of knick-knacks in a few years when you move to Utah? NO. You’re supposed to be purging your life of unnecessary items, not gathering and collecting more junk.”

Sierra calls me Mama Llama. It was hard to pass this up.

Lately I have taken to snapping pictures of merchandise I love, and it allows me to visually enjoy the items without buying them. I still buy stuff, of course, like photography equipment, seasonal clothes, and dogs, but I'm proud to say I save money when I can by buying used lenses, thrift shop clothing, and rescued dogs. 

My dream home is small, cozy, organized, and paid for.

Nowadays when I think of things I would like to buy, I often have to ask myself if it will end up in a yard sale or thrift store one day. Most of the time, the answer is yes, and it helps me keep my resolve to keeping my possessions to a minimum. 

When I was faced with the cutesy bunnies a few days ago, I snapped some pictures with my cellphone and the darling Easter figurines stayed behind. (If you need the address of the thrift shop in Saint Charles, just let me know. I bet those unbelievably cute bunnies are still there!) I may break my bric-à-brac addiction yet. 

Knick knack paddy whack!

No More Rear View Mirror Living

Miracle Morning #4

This girl has never needed an alarm clock; thanks to insomnia. Part of my daily routine this week includes setting an alarm for 4:00, just in case. Imagine my surprise at waking to the ringtone on my phone, after sleeping eight hours. That’s a miracle, in and of itself. 

If you knew how many mornings I was grateful to have slept past 2:30, you would realize what a gift that sleep was to me. By 4:05, I was on the couch, drinking my water, spending a few minutes in silence, making Sami and Bristol wait until I was ready to change gears. They joined me in the living room while I focused on my affirmations and visualizations. I heard Chuck stirring, as I was wrapping up my reading from Job in the Bible. 

By 4:50, all four of us were out the door, getting in a 20 minute brisk walk before breakfast. We enjoyed some quiet time in the family room, while Chuck read the Bible, and I re-read The Miracle Morning. My very own copy arrived yesterday, and today I enjoyed reading with my highlighter. There is something so cool about owning my own book, and being able to mark it up. 

Today I read Chapter 3: The 95% Reality Check, which investigates why 95% of our society settles for less; so many people settle for a life of mediocrity. The concept of “rear view mirror syndrome” struck me as one of my issues. 

Hal Elrod wrote: 

“When presented with adversity, we go back to our trusty rearview mirror for guidance on how to respond. ‘Yep, just my luck. This crap always happens to me. I’m just going to give up; that’s what I’ve always done when things get too difficult.’”

How many times have I started a new fitness plan, energized at first by the possibilities, and then, as soon as I hit a bump in the road, I resorted to my bad habit of numbing myself from any negative feelings I was experiencing by eating myself into oblivion. Then, regret would sweep over me, and I would convince myself I just wasn’t cut out for living a life of moderation. 

Lies. So many lies I have told myself over the years. 

There was a time when I didn’t believe the lies. Of course, I had to hit my own rock bottom before I was willing to consider that I could do anything to which I committed myself. Back in the early 2000’s, I was seriously overweight. I kept telling myself I needed to lose the baby weight after giving birth to my third child, but I was kidding myself, thinking it was baby weight. 

That little boy was three years old the day we were going to the pool, and I had stuffed myself into my matronly one-piece swimsuit. He was standing on the king-size bed which allowed him to pat his little hands on my back. 

“Mama, your back has boobs, too,” he announced. Oh, lordy. How had I let myself go so far? That was my rock bottom moment. 

Thanks to my brother Eric, and Bridger's innocent, but painful comment, I began lifting weights, doing cardio, and eating clean six out of seven days a week. My brother and I were both following Bill Phillips’ plan in his book Body for Life. That was a game changer for me. One of my favorite parts of the program was choosing three people each day to lift and encourage. Living a life of service became an essential part of my life. 

Now it’s 2018, 18 years later. It took me three years to lose 80 pounds. When I started shopping for size 4 clothes, I realized I had lost too much weight, and found that I was most comfortable, and felt stronger, when I was between a size 6 and 8. I maintained my healthier weight for about nine or ten years, and then I began to struggle again. Recently, I found myself precariously close to my obese self.

Right before the holidays of 2017, I knew I had to recommit myself to healthier living. I signed up for Beach Body on Demand, and joined a challenge group. I lost 10 pounds during the holidays, then struggled to keep the momentum going after the new year, and finally I was able to jump back into eating healthier and working out.

Right now, I’ve lost a total of 15 pounds since November. I am committing to living The Miracle Morning lifestyle, and am so excited to be on my way to living my best life, in so many areas of my life. 

My daughter, some of my former students, and several of my girlfriends just started reading the Miracle Morning book. They are feeling energized, and are committing themselves to living up to their potential.

Is anyone else out there trying this? Each day really feels like such a gift. I hope you will check it out, if you are interested in saying goodbye to bad habits, and want to get the most out of every day. You can download two chapters of the book, and many motivational resources HERE to get you started. 

A Miracle Midnight

My Miracle Morning started just after midnight this morning. I figured I might as well put my insomnia to good use while I waited for my meds to kick in, since I had forgotten to take them at bedtime.

What a great idea, right?

So there I was in the middle of the night, still in bed, practicing silence, offering a few prayers for sleep, and some expressions of gratitude. I reviewed my affirmations and visualizations, and then I read about Job in the Bible for about 10 minutes. By then, I was feeling sleepy, and headed off to dreamland. I vaguely remember dreaming about Daddy; how I wish I could retrieve the details because I woke up feeling happy.

Yesterday a friend and I talked about the overwhelming feelings we get when we look too far into the future. For her, it is knowing a loved one would not be recovered enough from surgery to walk until mid-summer. For me, it is realizing it is going to take months of work outs and clean eating before I can reclaim my smaller clothes from the guest room closet. Mid-summer was looking so far away for both of us.

We agreed that if we can focus on this moment in time, and live each day fully as it comes, we will both feel better. It's not always easy to do, but it nearly always improves my attitude to break a big goal down into manageable chunks.

This morning, after Chuck headed to work, I walked Bristol and Sami for 20 minutes, and then I had a healthy breakfast of spinach and eggs.

How does that much spinach shrink down to a small portion of veggies in
my skillet?

You've heard about eating frogs early in the day so the rest of the day just gets better from there? I decided to EAT MY FROG right after breakfast this morning, which was deep-cleaning my little bathroom. I pulled EVERYTHING out of the cabinets and drawers while my breakfast cooled. As soon as I finished eating, I cleaned, purged, and organized. To make my frog a little sweeter, I listened to some motivational podcasts. The time seemed to fly by, and I am so glad I got that out of the way!

By 7:30, I was feeling pretty accomplished, but I decided to empty a kitchen cabinet, knowing that I wouldn’t be able to tolerate seeing that mess on my countertops for long, and then all of my canned goods will be organized with just a few more moments of work.

This day is off to a great start. Now that I've done my "scribing," thanks to my blog, I'm off to work out with a Beach Body video. My miracle midnight led to a miracle morning, which is giving way to a miracle day. If you're interested in learning more about my experience with Life S.A.V.E.R.S or about The Miracle Morning, click on the links in this post.

My Miracle Morning

Just when my PERSISTENCE was slipping, I heard about Hal Elrod's book, The Miracle Morning. I couldn't wait to read it, and I devoured the whole thing in less than 24 hours. Who wouldn't want to learn about being our best, authentic selves by committing to simple, daily habits that can be completed before eight o'clock in the morning? 

Ask Chuck; I love browsing the self-help and personal development books on Amazon and at Barnes and Noble. This book is right up my alley. Maybe you would like it, too.

You know I'm already a morning person (thank you, insomnia), but Elrod's advice applies to my friends and family who are night owls, too. 

Hal says he was not a morning person, either, but he became one after making two incredible comebacks; one after a horrific accident left him in a coma, and then later, after hitting rock-bottom; financially, emotionally, and spiritually. Over time, he developed a morning routine that changed not only his life, but many others' lives, too.

Are you living the life you imagined for yourself? Are you interested in becoming your best self? Do you want to feel more confident and happy? Are you trying to figure out what you want to do with "your one wild and precious life?" Is living life to its fullest appealing to you?

Hal Elrod's tips are not a secret; just Google "Miracle Morning," and your search will lead you to all sorts of resources to experience a Miracle Morning for yourself. Many of them are free, offered by the website in the link above. I didn't even pay for my book; I borrowed it from our library's online site.

The mnemonic device for the Miracle Morning routine is Life S.A.V.E.R.S. By getting up one hour earlier, and spending that time on these six tasks, we can all start our day feeling energized and more confident. By taking this time for personal development, we can discover our passions, and set specific goals for what we hope to be and do.

S is for SILENCE.

A is for AFFIRMATIONS.

V is for VISUALIZATION.

E is for EXERCISE.

R is for READ.

S is for SCRIBING. (Most of us call this task WRITING, but Hal says a word that starts with W wouldn't work with the mnemonic.)

"See things as you would have them be, instead of how they are." -Robert Collier

Canva.com is my go-to site for making graphics, and I wanted to create visual reminders of my morning routine, and a vision board of what living my best life would look like. I found pictures from a time when I was taking care of myself, eating clean most of the time, lifting weights, and doing cardio. It wasn't just about losing weight then. Of course, I set specific fitness goals, but encouraged by Bill Phillips, I also set goals to serve others. Each day I set an intention to help three people with support and encouragement. My goals is to bring together the best parts of who I used to be, and who I am becoming. 

As I approach the end of my fifties, I know if I commit to living my best life, I will feel better, and look better. I am not striving for perfection; just authenticity. I'm looking forward to turning sixty. My life is just getting better and better.

Let me know if you check out The Miracle Morning. I'd love to know I have friends and family who are walking the same road I am. I will be re-reading the book these next few days, taking my time to let all of this good information sink in, and make a difference in my morning, and in my life.

Treat Yo'Self

Today, my to-do list is long, but I've been knocking things out right and left. There are a couple of things on my list that are all about me today, and to offset my guilt, I wanted to make sure I took care of my people, too. 

Why do we do that; feel guilty for doing things we enjoy, and the things that make us feel better about ourselves? Chuck reminds me often that I deserve to be pampered as much as he does, and he does lots of little things that show his love and appreciation. 

As I was growing up, I just think I watched my mom and stepmom put others first so much, I may have wrongly concluded that to be happy, we caregivers need to put ourselves last. It's just not the case, folks. I'm a slow learner, but I'm learning.

The phrase "TREAT YO'SELF" is a popular one right now. 

So today, I am "treating myself." And I'm doing a pretty good job of it. In between the cooking and baking, the cleaning and tidying, the checking on our moms, and making sure our dog Sami takes it easy, I built in some things that make me pause, and just enjoy myself. 

When I first got up, I did a little reading to help me with my personal development goals. As soon as Chuck headed out the door to work, I scurried to get a few things started, like laundry, and cleaning up the kitchen, and then I did my workout in front of our big screen TV. My days just go better when I take that time for myself, and try to stay ahead of the housework. 

Even though I had a lot I wanted to accomplish today, I set aside time for Coffee and Cameras with Susan. We went to one of our favorite local coffee shops, and just savored the time to take a break from the demands we both have in our lives right now. We talked about our families, health goals, and photography; we always talk about photography. 

The encouragement and support I find during our weekly chats boosts my morale in ways I had not anticipated. Having a friend who shares my enthusiasm for life and creating art is such a gift. 

What makes you feel pampered? And the concept of pampering seems foreign to you, what makes you feel like you are taking care of yourself? Is it savoring a special treat? Drinking your favorite tea from a beautiful tea cup? Buying fresh flowers for yourself? Walking outdoors, enjoying the beauty of nature? Spending time doing a favorite hobby? Listening to music, or reading a book?

Today is a huge treat yo'self day for me because tonight I'm flying to Utah to see all of my babies; the ones who share my DNA, and the people whom my children love. I get to see a couple of my grandpuppies, too. 

Chuck has been so supportive of my role as a mother, and he is holding down the fort at home, while I spend a long weekend in Utah. 

It will be my honor to do Bridger and Joscelyne's engagement photo session, and we will get to celebrate Dylan's birthday while I'm here. Sierra is driving all the way from northern Utah to southern Utah to spend the weekend with all of us at Dylan and Jamie's. Monday I get to spend the whole day with my mom. A mother-daughter day is a rare thing for us, living so far away from each other.

My treats today include drinking good coffee with a friend, taking a few photos, making bread for our friends who are helping with the dogs while I'm out of town, and getting ready for a long weekend with the kids. 

What about you? What will you do today that will nourish your spirit and your body, and make you smile with pleasure and pride, just knowing you are taking care of yourself? I hope you find some way to feel spoiled today. 

Take a little time for yourself; you deserve it. 

Waiting for the Dog-nosis

Our sweet Sami has been struggling when she stands up after lying down. It takes her longer to get up, and then she hobbles a bit like she is in pain. Sam can still run and play with Bristol, but afterwards, she seems to have trouble with her back legs. I've been fearing hip dysplasia for several weeks now. 

One of the reasons I was so happy we adopted mixed breed rescue pups was I thought we would be able to dodge the bullet of genetic defects so common in the overbred popular breeds. 

Chuck and I decided we'd rather know what was wrong with our labradorable mix of a pup so we could help make her comfortable, and manage her health with our vet's knowledge and help. 

Sami was so happy to see Dr. K. Our vet always gets down on the floor with the dogs, and loves on them, letting them sniff and lick her. After a manual examination of Sam's hips and legs, Dr. K wanted to test for Lyme disease and heart worms because arthritis can be a symptom of those. She also recommended getting x-rays so we could see what was going on with Sami's legs. 

While I waited for the results, my husband and I texted back and forth. 

"Any dog-nosis yet?" Chuck wanted to know. Oh, I love how he can make me smile, even when I am nervous and worried.

While Sam and I waited in the examination room, every single sound intrigued her. She stared at the door, whining. I think she kind of likes her doctor.

Finally Dr. K came back with the words I was waiting to hear, "Well, the good news is, Sami's hips look great." I was so relieved.

"The bad news is she has a problem with her knees." That is not what I wanted to hear. The fancy-schmancy term for her diagnosis is "medial luxating patella." In other words, Sami has a trick knee. Her knee cap slips out of the femoral groove, and pops back into place, eventually. Dr. K said the condition is common among toy breeds; not big retriever mixes like Sami. 

Dr. K is taking a conservative approach, and doesn't think we need to worry about surgery. She hopes we can manage Sami's symptoms, and keep our active girl healthy and happy.

Our challenge for the next week is to keep her still. The vet gave us an anti-inflammatory to try(a free sample-BONUS). Sami can only go outside on her leash, just long enough to take care of business, and then it's back inside for her. That would be easier if we only had one dog, but with our two shenanigators, this might be tricky.

Wish us luck. We love these puppies so much. We want our Sami-Girl to be able to run and play with Bristol for a long, long time.

Buttery Sugar Jumbles

Chuck's Favorite Cookie 
(Recipe Card Below)

These are the simplest cookies ever, and one of my husband's favorite memories from childhood. They are buttery and chewy, and the chunky sugar granules baked on top of them give the cookies a crisp outer layer. This is the go-to cookie at our house; a Bennorth favorite.

When I am being a super-duper wife, I make sure to keep a supply of Sugar Jumbles in our freezer at all times. And yes, the cookies are good frozen, too, if you're in too much of a hurry to wait for them to thaw. Just ask Chuck. 

This was Chuck's favorite recipe his mom made during Christmas when her sons were growing up. It works for Valentine's, and makes any day a special day around these parts. 

It was a good recipe, but if you know me, you know I've never met a recipe I couldn't alter. 

First of all, I doubled it. I also eliminated the sifting step, and replaced the shortening with butter because I never have shortening on hand. And who doesn't like butter to bring out the yumminess of a soft, chewy cookie?

Sugar Jumbles

Preheat oven to 375 degrees.

Cream these ingredients together in the mixer on a low speed.

1 cup butter 

1 cup white sugar

Add these to the mixture: 

2 eggs

2 teaspoons vanilla

Stir in:

3 cups flour

1/2 teaspoon soda

1/2 teaspoon salt

Form 1 inch balls of dough, and roll in raw or colored sugar, and bake on lightly greased cookie sheet until lightly browned. Bake at 375 for 8-10 minutes.

Cookies should be soft. Cool cookies on a baker's rack before storing in an airtight container.

Mardi Gras

Today is a special day for many people. It goes by many names. Shrove Tuesday. Carnaval. Mardi Gras. Fat Tuesday.

Here's my take on things after a little Googling: Shrove Tuesday seems to focus on confession before the Lenten season begins, and evidently, pancakes are involved. Carnaval or Mardi Gras seems to be about partying and parades with purple, green, and gold beads, and Fat Tuesday seems to be about eating lots of sweet things like pastries and paczkis before beginning a season of fasting before Good Friday. 

Photo: Sweetwater's Donut Mill in Kalamazoo, Michigan.

Of the four, Fat Tuesday has been calling my name. I love to eat, and this holiday is an excuse to indulge in all the sweets, especially paczki (a Polish pastry that looks like an über-fancy donut with filling and frosting). What more could a girl want? Maybe a little ice cream and some cookies, too.

Until I moved to Saint Charles, Illinois, I had never heard of Fat Tuesday. Now let me embarrass myself by telling you I minored in French, and never bothered to translate the French "Mardi Gras" to the English "Fat Tuesday." I just knew it was a big carnival and party day in New Orleans.

When I first learned about Fat Tuesday, I could not believe I'd missed celebrating this amazing day of feasting and merrymaking. Our ancestors came from Germany, and I was sad to learn that Germans also celebrate Karneval. I'm not sad that Germans observe the holiday, but honestly, why didn't Grandma and Grandpa tell me about this holiday of EATING. ALL. THE. THINGS? This girl's been missing out.

Well, except for that fasting part. I've never been very good at being pious or giving up good stuff for any length of time. I'm just interested in the going wild with yumminess part of the celebration.

Last year by the time I even knew what a paczek was, all of the local bakeries had sold out of the delicacies. Apparently, those in the know order their pastries weeks in advance. 

You can take your chances and hope to score a paczek or two as a walk-in customer, but from what I hear, the odds are against you. So I was bound and determined that THIS year would be my year; I was going to try paczki!

PSSST. A-hem. Excuse me, Ms. Persistence. You have been feasting and merrymaking for the last several weeks; days on end. You've had ice cream, chocolate waffles with frosting, Oreos, and cookies. Yeah, stuffing your face with Polish pastries is just what you need to compound your issues with binge-eating. Go crazy, and introduce your tongue to one more thing to crave. Or not. 

So what about ceasing and desisting with the party in your mouth, and get back to the business of persisting, Missy.

Sigh. 

Yesterday, I finally summoned up some motivation, and focused my attention on working out and eating healthy food. I was Queen of the Sledding Hill, and spent a half an hour sliding down, and walking back up the hill. I politely declined delicious, fluffy scones made by a friend. I drank a protein-spinach shake, and had some veggies. For supper I had a bowl of chicken and rice soup. When I was craving something sweet, I made "Nice Cream." I blended frozen bananas with cocoa and protein powder until it was the consistency of soft-serve ice cream. It was the first day in a long time that I felt completely satisfied by the end of the day, and I didn't go to bed with a super-full stomach, or a guilt-ridden brain.

This morning I woke up, and it occurred to me that if I still wanted some paczki, I was going to have to leave for the bakery as soon as Chuck left for work at six. I texted my friend Joy about my mixed feelings. I told her I thought I should sit this Fat Tuesday out. Did I really want to return to my bad habits after one day of doing so well? If I were on my deathbed tomorrow, I'm pretty sure I wouldn't be broken-hearted about never having tried paczki.

Joy encouraged me to do whatever was best for my mental health. In her opinion, paczki are pretty much glorified donuts, and similar items are available at various upscale donut shops. 

Her words were reassuring to me. There will be other chances to try paczkis. That settled it. 

By 6:45, I had finished my workout video, and exercised for thirty minutes, and I was out the door to spend the morning with little Elise. 

Happy Fat Tuesday, friends. Enjoy something yummy for me! I've been enjoying something yummy for you all month long. Now it's YOUR turn.