The Great Internet Disconnect

How long could YOU go without screen time?  Could you unplug yourself from your phone and your computer and your tablet?  I have been asking myself these questions lately, and the answers were making me squirm.  I have many OCD issues, but I would have to say the thing that I am most compulsive about is checking my cell phone.  I check the time (and yet, for some strange reason, the time never registers in my brain so I have to check it again), I check email, I check texts, I check my blog, and I check Facebook.  I truly am obsessive AND compulsive about my technology.

This morning, Dylan and I were up early, getting ready to go to Sand Hollow before the sun scorched the desert and sent the temperatures over 100 degrees.  Getting Bridger going early in the morning is an exercise in patience, but we managed.  We were in Dylan's pickup by 7:30.

Just before we left, I had a spontaneous thought.  One of my goals is to loosen the grip some of my obsessive-compulsive tendencies have on me.  I had watched a video last week that had touched me.  It had inspired me to "disconnect to reconnect."  I knew it was something I needed to do more often, especially when my husband and children are present.

Disconnect to Connect YouTube video  You can click this link to watch the 90 second video.

At the last minute, I texted my husband and posted to Facebook,  "Good morning!!! Going fishing with my boys. I'm declaring the day NO TECHNOLOGY DAY...well, at least until we come back to civilization. Wish me well. Checking my Facebook is my biggest OCD behavior of all. A little nervous I am."  I powered off my phone and left it on the kitchen counter.  And just like that, I walked away from my beloved phone.

Sand Hollow is northeast of Saint George near Hurricane.  The reservoir is crystal clear and is a good place for bass fishing, if you like to fish, which I don't.  I hate to fish. I hate the smell of worms and Power Bait and fish.  The only fun thing about fishing is casting and I was chastised for the incessant casting and reeling I did a long time ago when I tried to have a little fun.  I haven't fished since. So I have to find other ways to enjoy myself when I accompany the men in my family who enjoy "drowning a worm" now and again.

In my CamelBak hydration backpack I put my camera, journal, book, snacks, cooling cloths, and sunscreen...but not my Droid Razr cell phone.  While the boys hiked up and down the red rock surrounding the water, trying to find the perfect fishing hole, I tagged along behind them, taking pictures as we walked.  There were beautiful white flowers in bloom in the hot, red desert sand.  I loved catching pictures of my boys casting their fishing poles, taking sips of water, talking together, standing in silence alone on the rocks. 

As the sun made its way across the sky and I got hotter by the minute, I looked longingly at the lake.  The clear water teased me, lapping against the red sandstone shoreline.  I pulled out my neckerchief filled with beads that plump up with water to facilitate cooling on occasions such as this.  I was so tempted to take off my shoes and socks and get my feet wet.  The hotter it got, the more I entertained the thought of immersing my whole body in the lake.  But today Dylan had told me about the probability of getting swimmer's itch.

Swimmer's itch is an awful skin rash resulting in pus-filled blisters, and is caused by a bacteria that is in certain bodies of water.  Sand Hollow contains that bacteria.  The rash is itchy and miserable.  Considering the consequences, I busied myself with soaking my Coolcore cloth, dripping water from my Camelbak onto the cloth and snapping it to activate its cooling feature.  It was my salvation as sweat trickled down my torso.  

I envied the water skiers.  The skiers were young and not scared off by threats of a rash. They were laughing and enjoying themselves immensely.  I, on the other hand, was drinking copious amounts of water and getting hotter by the minute.  My life is all about comfort.  I was taking comfort in the fact that I was avoiding the dreaded bacteria hiding in the lake, and doing everything I could to stay cool without diving in head first.  Yes, I am plagued by the mindset of the "mature."

Case in point:  I looked like a dork on the rocks, but I was cooler because of my dorky attire....not cooler culturally, mind you, but cooler physically.  We laughed about my attempts to avoid the heat.  "Nerd alert!"  Dylan teased.  He recorded me in all of my glory.  I was smiling at the camera. "Shrink, don't smile in every picture.  Write in your journal.  Look like you just had a great idea!"

After jotting notes in my notebook, and taking pictures of the boys and the beautiful scenery, I decided to find a shadier spot and read.  I'd just started The Pilgrimage by Paolo Coelho, and took advantage of the boys' quiet fishing time to get a little farther in my book. Eventually, all of the water I'd been drinking caught up with me.  It was time to traipse back to the restrooms.  That settled it; the boys had only pulled one tiny bass to shore, and they decided they had had enough sun, too.

We drove around the sand dunes, and some of the newer housing developments in the area.  Dylan spotted a pair of sunglasses on the side of the road, and he asked Bridge to go get them.  When he put the purple plaid Burberry glasses on, he asked, "Do these sunglasses make me look as sexy as I feel?"  That boy...  He had never heard of Burberry, but I recognized it as a high end name in the fashion industry.  If only I had my phone, I could prove to him he had found a treasure by showing him what a pair of those glasses were worth.  That was the first time I really missed my cell phone.

I will admit that by not being glued to a screen, I had more opportunities to be an active participant with the boys this morning.  It is something I will do again.  It was worth it to leave the technology behind.  

When we arrived at the house, it was 11:57.  The boys made me wait three more minutes.  "Wait for it..."  Five hours techonology-free, and I had survived!  When I checked in on Facebook, I had 15 notifications.  Friends had teased me about my "break."  They know I'm addicted.  They know it wasn't easy.  It was probably good for them to have a break from me, too!  

The first thing I Googled was Burberry sunglasses.  They retail for over $200.  What a nice find they turned out to be!  Oh, I do love my internet connection and all of the information and communication it allows me.  But I will ALWAYS love my family more than ANYTHING...even Facebook!  

Who wouldn't be happy to be spending time with these boys?

The younger learns from the elder.

Fishing is serious business.

If Dylan is wearing his Kauai hat, it's
going to be a fishing day, Jamie says.

It's a thneaky thnake.  Just a blow snake,
thank goodness.  We got "up close and
personal."

*Meet the Beidlers!

Ice, ice, baby!  Aaaaaah...I have missed my ice packs, and this morning, I loaded up some Ziploc bags with ice from the machine at the hotel, and I'm getting REAL relief!  It's going to be a big day, getting Little Princess's wedding reception ready.  Does it sound like work?  Not with my family! The grandkids are such willing workers, and we all have so much fun together that my only concern is that these days are passing much too quickly.  Oh, dear. I feel tears stinging my eyes. I cannot get enough of these good people.

The weather gods have smiled upon us, relieving us of extreme heat and humidity this week. That always makes for happy summer days in the south.

Wedding plans are moving full speed ahead.  Natalie has so many last minute details to oversee, and Jackie has been managing "command central" for these last six months from her dining room table. I think they're nearly worn out, but are hanging in like the pros they are.  Sunday will be a day of collapse, and hopefully, relaxation for all of them.

We stopped at Rockfish Gap Country Store, my favorite little gift shop. Bridger and I continued our tradition of trying on hats. It's just something Beidler kids do with their folks. When I paid for my gifts, the clerk asked if I were from around here.  

"Well, ORIGINALLY, yes, but we're here from Utah this week."

"You look so familiar to me.  Something about the way you moved your face just now."

"I went to Nelson County High School."

"You're Denise Beidler!"

Ha ha ha. I had just reconnected with Kerry Swanson.  We had survived Algebra II together when I was a senior and she was a junior. What a small world.  (I have no idea what I had done with my face that triggered her memory.  I can only imagine.  From the candid pictures I EDIT of my myself, it could have been any number of embarrassing ways I contort my face. It was probably my "drunk look." That's the picture I delete the most!)

We had a nice lunch with Dad and Jackie at the Briar Patch Restaurant. I kept repeating, "I'm so HAPPY."

Dad said, "No wonder.  You haven't been planning a wedding.  I'd be happy, too."

Dad loves to tease us, reminding us his psychiatrist says he does NOT have to discuss wedding plans with ANYONE. He doesn't have a psychiatrist, but I do believe the voices in his head keep him going!

I keep hugging everyone (tears again) and trying to store up some of this positive energy for when I feel lonely for them when we go back to Utah. (Dang, I don't want to ruin my makeup!) It has been two years since we've all been together, and I have missed the camaraderie of my family.

My parents have such wonderful friends.  Jackie's Ya-Yas, her girlfriends since childhood, have stepped up to the plate, and gone the extra mile by preparing food for the reception, and arranging flowers, and too many other things to list!

Denise, Miss Marsha Honey, Natalie

My favorite teacher, Miss Marsha Ponton, became a friend of the family when she took on being a 4H advisor to my group in high school.  Miss Ponton and a couple from church prepared a wonderful Italian dinner for all of the Beidlers to enjoy last night at Ascension Episcopal Church. What a blessing that was for us all.  We simply showed up, ate a delicious meal, and enjoyed one another's company for the entire evening.  It was so sweet to watch the grandkids surround Granddaddy and laugh and visit.  Whoever made the seating arrangements and place cards knew what they were doing.  (Thank you, Miss Marsha Honey.)

Granddaddy, Bridger, Tatiana, and Rowan

Marsha began our evening by reminding us of our shared history...I was the first of the Beidlers in her 8th grade English class.  She reminded each of us where we sat in her classroom, remembering Eric was in the back by the windows, and definitely had attention issues. Eric agreed that he had ADHD before that was a common diagnosis! Miss Ponton remembered that December Monday when I came to class to announce that I had a new baby sister named Natalie. Jackie had Natalie the night of the 8th Grade Christmas Dance. I will never forget that!

I am absolutely rambling, and I am doing this for me, not you poor souls who peek in to see what I am writing. There are so many details I want to remember.

I can't wait to hear how Bridger and his cousins slept last night.  The kids swear they're staying in a haunted house. There is a graveyard on the property, and that has them very concerned. We've taken pictures of the enormous cicada skins left behind on the trees at the family home. A lightning bug landed on my hand last night in the car.  I felt like I had received a blessing from heaven. Catching bugs on warm summer nights, and keeping them in Mason jars for a night light, are some of my favorite childhood memories. How I miss lightning bugs turning the backyard into a magical fairy kingdom at dusk.

I need to go down for breakfast. I happily noticed that peanut butter is offered on the breakfast buffet, and also that grits are available! I love my peanut butter. Miss Natalie will be here soon to whisk me away to the reception hall. We're going to transform it into a lovely backdrop for a celebration of her wedding day. This week just gets better and better, and unfortunately, faster and faster.  "Backward, turn backward, o, time in your flight.  Make me a child again, just for tonight."  (Thank you, Elizabeth Akers Allen.)